It's been over 24 months since the stork dropped off your adorable little bundle, and if you're anything like most new-ish parents, well, "sexy time" feels like a secret that only child-free people know about. Between diaper changes and deciphering why everyone keeps chanting "Cocomelon," when did it get so hard to remember what exactly a "date night" is? Girl, put down that baby monitor for a sec; we've got some secrets to share.

Schedule Intimacy Like a Grown-up, Baby

No shade, but remember those days when you had the luxury of "feeling the moment"? Fast-forward to today, and if it’s not in your calendar with at least two reminders, it's probably not happening. Schedule some time for just the two of you. Make it sacred. Put it between "binge-watch 'The Bachelor'" and "fold laundry," and let’s be honest—you know which one can wait.

This isn't your grandma's to-do list; make room for a little

Set the Scene to Steal the Show

Scented candles, mood lighting, Marvin Gaye on Spotify... or at least a Spotify playlist called Marvin Gaye on Spotify. There, you've got the makings of a scene so seductive even your inner cynic will want to swoon. But hey, let's not kid ourselves—it's not just about the ambiance. Romance isn’t something you can fit into a Pinterest board; it’s all in the vibe, darling.

A lit candle won't light your fire if it doesn't come from the heart.

The Language of Love: Develop Your Dictionary

When you’ve spent the last two years babbling gibberish to a kid, sometimes that spills over into your adult conversations. While cute, let's spice up those semantics. Whisper sweet nothings. If not, just send them a cheeky emoji—even if it's just an eggplant with a winky face. But remember, effective communication isn't just about emojis; voice it out without the emojis for a giggle or two!

The words "I love you" are free, use liberally.

Be Playful with New Adventures

Listen, routine can be the ultimate passion killer. Switch it up now and then to save each other from deat

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Don't Let the Mom Bod Block the Fun

Two words: Mum Tum. Don't let it haunt you. Whether you're flaunting it or hiding it under layers of cashmere, embrace that body because the real truth is confidence can be the most attractive thing in the room. However, if you find that a pair of leggings can help you find this confidence, so be it—sometimes we all need to level up our wardrobe game.

Unplug to Plug Back Into Each Other

Let's face it, being in the same room doesn’t always mean true connection. While it’s tempting to scroll through social media for hours, make it a habit to unplug. That way, you’ll finally catch up on the 2 billion things you’ve been meaning to talk about—but somehow, scrolling those memes always seems to take precedence.

The WiFi can wait; love cannot.